posts tagged "personal"
every time my brother posts on my facebook wall
or responds to one of my posts
i just get so sad
because i miss him so much
then i try to remember how shitty he was and how he basically told me to starve myself once
but all i can feel is sadness because i just want him here so bad
#favorite person
omfg have u ever hated someone so much that u just want to kill urself whenever they are near oh goddd
this is not an exaggeration im about to slit my wrists every time im near them jesus hcrist
| i'm afraid when tennis starts i won't be able to run because i've been eating so badly and not working out | me: |
| ok well you should go to the gym tomorrow then | mom: |
| what no | me: |
| ur not supposed to tell me to work out | |
| ur supposed to tell me i'll be fine | |
| so i can go back to eating | |
| don't you know how this works |
I just discovered that I have like serious social problems
I have like super bad anxiety when people get too close to me and it sucks, because I get really lonely normally because I don’t have many people to hang out with, but I don’t want to like get close to anyone. Oh man this sucks.
I just gave a new friend of mine my phone number and now I’m like having an anxiety attack WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Maybe this is just because I’ve had TERRIBLE experiences with people getting way too close to me and then making expectations for me that I don’t end up fulfilling. And because of this, I’ve started to think that every friendship I ever have will be just like this, so I tend to keep friends at an arms length, and this SUCKS and I DON’T LIKE IT but I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO.
Maybe I need counseling or something? I don’t know, this is just something about me that is bothering me.
- depression settling in
- i’m so fat
- i’m gonna be alone all my life
- my brother is leaving
- i don’t have friends
- i can’t make friends
- i’m gonna fail school
- oh
- god
have you ever had someone you hate so much that they don’t even have to do anything to ruin your day
like just seeing them
and hearing them
makes you want to kill yourself
and you’re constantly in a personal battle to be better than them in any way possible
and then you realize that they’re better than you in like every way
and you hate yourself because of this
jfc
- i haven’t been in a very ~christmasy~ mood at all lately
- like if i didn’t look at a calender it would pass by without me noticing
- finally thought of something to get me excited
- gonna get out my Calvin & Hobbes books to read the winter comics
- this makes me very happy (:
I get to see my brother 3 weeks from tomorrow.
I am so excited. I can’t even begin to explain how important he is to me. I honestly think of him as my best friend.
I find it hard to make friends usually, and I have this bad habit of pushing away any one who I feel gets too attached to me. That’s why he’s so important in my life. It’s unconditional and uncomplicated and simple, everything I could want in a friend.
Sorry, just had to share my excitement at being able to hang out with him, even if it’s only for 4 short days during my Thanksgiving break.
